Title: How to survive the 'terrible twos'

" The terrible -- the term used to describe the roller coaster ride toddlers take their parents Don and they begin to assert their independence. First time moms and dads soon find out the Campbell's. I'm not confined to the second year and in many cases actually escalate into year three. The good news is there are some steps you can take to survive the temples no matter when they strike. You can't specialist Charlie apple C joins us with some advice -- because they couldn't do. Gordon. And extends to the fours and fives and -- god by the artist -- let's go to the other. You always feel so badly for those parents stuck in the grocery store at the department store that are. He kind of taking the wailing child through the I'll -- to do well."

" I remember our first out of this business I was asked to do a parenting class of parents of freer world and prior to the class I talked with some of them they said please help us with the store site I was an apparent at the time and work with the young kids. I read every book I could on taking kids into the stores every one of them said the same thing don't do it. We don't know link into a totally that's -- adding that kind of looks good to them at bats but there are strategies we can use with kids 23 and four and five that. Really. Can work. Did they stop the behavior because no Rasul ten and one of this great book touch points three to stick says. This Acosta refueling going on with kids will get some of the interventions you give them and then hope that they'll come back and test. And so that roller coaster review does a good Mormon and I've -- a number of books that talk about. The terrible two's three's and four's being this kind of on and off again kind of thing just when you think your kid is. Listening and the contract based died doing something crazy. And you just -- ride it out there are good strategies so let's talk about some of those strategies number 11 understand the behavior. Behavior is a message so. Try to figure out ways is coming from maybe there's pledged legitimate reason for the tip it's not just his development he's hungry may be sick when he got picked on a preschool. Maybe you have to be giving him enough attention her so. That's what's always understand behaviors the message was try to figure that out."

" Another thing is try to identify problems books for example let's say the kid has trouble in the store has trouble when you're on the phone. OK once you've identified problems but see if you can strategize with the kid. How about. You know I know if you don't like when I'm on the phone. I don't play -- how about. Each time on the phone so -- I hang up I'll give you won't call. I know or something like that -- about when -- at the store and you don't want to leave. We can negotiate and I'll give it three more minutes. And then once you come up of the agreement remind the kid about that before you before you leave and even during the week so that's a really nice strategy."

" I meant I was without looking at something you were saying about it's kind of like sales tactic you know she is would you like immediate pro war or at five do you have signed --"

" Races -- choices is a great thing everybody says give the -- choices Sosa you have to get the kid to bed to kids given to protect -- it's time -- do you what the fireman's carry or the dinosaur walk. You know or shall we play the freeze game like but I look -- young kids we say okay let's walk to the store let's walk to the car the ideal please. And I think -- who's moving simulate -- games so choices. If -- a behavior issue could you please chill out. You're making some bad choices you can sit in the living room -- that you know wherever you want when you empower kids with -- that they -- more likely to do it. And also practices desired behavior. I don't want to get out the top of the other top okay. I'll give you five more minutes but what do you say when the time's up that I tell -- Thanks dad for the X deprived as well would be going to say thank -- attack you and then you have to say it twenty times that. 321 what do you say. Thanks dad or hope hope -- it's time to go up I don't know and so practicing the is that we'll get it into the neurons and that's more likely the kid to do it. And if we just a couple seconds there but at and wrap up. What what price to parents pay if they give into the behavior. You could end up you know the classically spoiled kid the kid who feels that the parents don't care about. If they always given -- bracelets and again as being touch points last night and said a quarter number -- this said that. If you don't set appropriate limits consequences versus punishment consequences are related to what you can do the message it is the parents don't care not -- that respect the limits them. How -- I think thank you so much whether that's at at."