Title: Alan Bean: The Life of An Astronaut

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" This is the WGBH for a minute mark. Good evening and welcome to the 2000 -- Lowell lecture on astronomy. Generously funded by the Lowell institute and organized every year by the Charles Hayden Planetarium. I'm Robin Simon on the director of the planetary. I want to -- public television station WGBH. For collaborating with us to make this exciting event available. To a wider audience. And now to the reason that we're all here tonight. Like a quick show of hands. How many you have -- to the move. Nobody. A young man over here. Nobody yeah okay. I know what are we gonna do there is one person here who really has been for them. And is -- great honor to introduce him to you and tell you a little bit about his career. Allen dean has had a fascinating career he was an aeronautical engineer. Naval aviator. Astronauts. And now an accomplished artist. Creating paintings that record humankind first exploration of another world. As Apollo twelve lunar module pilot captain Allen being became the fourth man to set foot on the moon. As spacecraft commander of the second skylab mission. He lived for 59 days in space 27270. Miles above are beautiful plan. His crew accomplished 150%. Of their pre mission -- We had never done that in my department here. Why is that. A record that has not been surpassed before or cents. During his career as an astronaut Alan helped establish eleven world records in aeronautics and instincts. Allen left the National Aeronautics and Space Administration. In 1981. To paint his experiences. And those of his fellow astronauts on them. The individuals. Who first traveled. To space. And in particular those who went to the moon. A remarkable human beings. They had courage beyond what most of us can imagine. They had skills training and intelligence. That most of us could not compete -- One of them is also an artist. Who painted his experiences on another world. Every culture. Needs courageous and brilliant innovators. Who can and will travel to the frontier. Every culture also even more. Needs artists. Who can interpret that experience of the frontier. Allen being his --"

" We have an exciting video that will help to introduce astronaut team."

" Love that name not being I'm very easy but did unveil mom maybe god I'm goal. Well deserved to organize and make it up that's. Our energies and skills. Because that's challenges why we're. Well I'm Leon -- involved. It's."

" Man descent through the."

" This is running -- My job."

" Spacecraft commander of the second skylab mission. During his illustrious career as an aeronautical engineer. Many believe it test pilot and -- Allen dean has been instrumental. In establishing a Muslim world records in aeronautics and space. Captain -- has reached unparalleled. Not only in aeronautics. But also win television film education. And the visual arts. His artwork she's been featured on national and international television. He is received honorary doctorate -- Texas Wesleyan college and the University of Akron. And he has flown over 25 types of military aircraft. In all of -- convenes endeavors he has demonstrated a profound dedication to team. Our focus on working towards well defined goals and an understanding of the importance of taking. -- He is proven. -- we truly can expand the boundaries of what we need is an individual human beings can't count. Captain. The term sustained effort. An extraordinary. Dedication. Human beings can go where ever we dream."

" Okay."

" Please join me in welcoming captain Alan."

" Hello fellow earthlings. --"

" Human beings. Earthlings and human beings we have been given a great. Great years for child talk about that night. But the first one is that fact. Six point four billion people alive this earth right now supposedly. There's not a single one like anyone in this room. There's a single one like this girl right here or will ever be like this girl. Sits. Humans stood up right long years ago. Until. The end of time there'll never be a person like this gentleman right here. Okay. With that uniqueness that great gift. That means that within and I think we've had these feelings most of us we have got a song to -- We've got a story it now. We've got something to do -- our life that no one else can do. That is part of the great gift. We are this special unique human being on this earth. We've got to figure out what we can do with these unique things we've been given. That's the basic problem of life I think. It's one that. We've got to -- of Richard got -- to -- and talked about that a little tonight and talk a little bit about. Going to them and what we did. I'm gonna tell you that number one thing I learned in my eight years us. Now and I do. Mean you're gonna say that's not much for him to -- years. I argued though that. It is my opinion that build many people know this or have heard or say they do it when I look around there not doing it. So I try to do it. Talk a little bit more about that later. Remember this is human beings we hear there dreamers. Where the doers. If any thing as. Ought to happen on this earth we're gonna have to do it. People just like -- people just like us have got to find a way to do things."

" I came to NASA in 1963. -- the pilot -- you heard. I hadn't done anything amazing in my life I certainly haven't achieved an impossible dream so why go to NASA and I think. This is okay they're gonna I'll be surrounded by genius is. They'll teach me how to go to the -- they'll build rockets they'll run mission control I don't have to be anymore and I am right now. -- navy pilot because -- When I got there there's the Johnson Space Center in the background. I'd be meetings similar to this I'd be in the macro -- words some -- standing up here and I would say to myself. -- and smarter than. And that was scary. Because I didn't do that I couldn't figure out. Much of what they're worse today. Than it is going around the earth that 2300 miles an act. Earth and the moon are going around the sun 66000. Miles an hour. In the whole business is going through the universe a million miles and a I didn't think -- had advanced calculus college differential equations I didn't do that great. I knew I could never figure out which way to point the -- to get. Maybe I could learn to flat okay apart arrived at -- make is this. We know how to do this none of us and get to the minute we didn't have the right technology to do it. But somehow. We believed. That working together. That we would find a way to get to the we would achievement possible during and we never none of -- that were achieved -- possible report. One last point. You never take -- test your life no one in this room has ever taken netcast that says what you can do with your life. It's here's how successful. In the future take lots of tips and tell what you know now. None of them say this person could do this great thing with their life. So why don't we been given as wide open gift to make something out of our life. Anything we really are willing to do now what. Turns out we didn't have to know all some of those things. We had to know its pilots as astronauts we had to know how to control the rocket when it went -- we didn't have to build it. We didn't have to make the space here. We did after it usually know how well we could use saying we didn't have to figure out which way to point the rocket of people in mission control would that. They didn't have to know what we we broke up into teams. Essentially and so I -- astronauts that we've got to go to them and we've got explorer. -- what can we do and 16 gravity. We knew that Forbes physicists and astronomers we knew the gravity -- which once it. So here I -- in my space suit. And that little devices that device when you head. Which lifted. 56 of my way up in that would allow me to move around and see how might feel on the moon. Now you might see if you look at closely frowning and that's because is that -- lifted up that says it did lift me. And so I'm getting one of the -- state -- it's ever been. And stuff. I don't like it that much. So I said let's put this down we patted issued as best we knew how. We we got down I got obviously we talked about it we repetitive an extra three days I tried it again didn't work so good. We even tried one time filling it with water thinking -- floating in there and that would help didn't work it was message and -- Finally we found ways to -- It worked pretty good. We knew getting to the -- was going to be difficult we knew what going to be possible to figure all this thing out the first time we just had to have. A good heart and a good energy -- not discouraged if this didn't work go home and think about it try to figure out what to do and in. How to correctly and -- try that they didn't work go back and try to figure that out and do it and that's how we did most things. Most adults won't do that kids will do that kids will make a lot of mistakes doesn't bother. And they keep going finally learn these things how we get in adults. We don't wanna do that and more we're getting bears are friends we'll see -- as a failed to do something -- we just given up. We got to overcome those things because every time you learn something that's part but we didn't work all the time. General Motors said you don't. These guys are getting their picture in the paper all the time let's give him some cars to drive around. -- maybe they'll get their picture in the paper with the cars that we thought that was a pretty good idea. It's now. They did come around to me when the new cars came out the new models -- say what we're gonna give you two cars which ones do you want low properly. And so I usually get a court that I have a corporate it was red and when your black all these things we at all it was more fun and go to my wife what does she what one -- she wanted to convertibles we've got that. Pictures you want to station it was fun it was the deal were still alive but it's not. Here's three of bison went 69 rolled around and we found out we were going to be the second crew to go to the moon or make the town talk about that. And -- Pete Conrad the commander. Dick Gordon gonna stay in the command module and keep track of it and neither lunar module pilot we got our cars Hussein we were all navy pilots and we were very good friends and really got along really good with each other. We thought we had the greatest job in the world. Who wouldn't drink it -- Every -- you're working hard but really you're -- Boy there's the -- I'm gonna go there and your friends were starting to go. And it's funny than men to me now looks different than it did days then in those days it looked pretty close it didn't look all that far away. Because we're in the simulators -- going there and we were watching out for eons ago in -- in and -- it's far away. There's no rockets around they could ever get to them without maybe ten years from now building something so the -- is drifted orbit. Psychologically is drifted much further away than it was when we were doing this. Well we were altering it."

" Three quarters. We had three -- straining to make the first wonderland. And we had to do it by the end of the decade so we said we're gonna send Apollo eleven. In July if they make it that's great but if they don't will send Apollo twelve in September 2 months later. And if they don't make it will send Apollo thirteen up too much later and that gives us 3 November. That gives us three opportunities to get to the moon is so we knew this wasn't going to be easy. We actually bought three extra -- modules through tech rockets. As we said we're gonna lose people do -- us there's no way to do this impossible dream. And do use technology it's just on the very edge of what humans can do at the moment. And not have some mistakes humans are great. But we're not perfect. So we knew that we said we're gonna give it a -- shot. But whatever happens is worth that. So that was the idea we lost a whole crew Iraq and everything else. And Apollo one before you got off the first flight and of course those of you who've seen the movie Apollo thirteen we almost lost him. So we worked too far wrong about was gonna go. July rolls around Apollo eleven launches there goes their rocket. Diehl Armstrong Buzz Aldrin. Mike Collins we don't know we know it's tough we wonder where if they're gonna make it. And so all of a sudden there's Buzz Aldrin on the moon. And it was a shock because the guy live right behind my house. It was funny because. This was more impossible to us than it was to the rest of the world because we were day today trying to figure out how to do it and we knew. So many things can go wrong so many things had to go right. We wondered if humans could do. This many things in a row right turned up with the idea. What he's up there with he's got a swimming pool so my kids and my wife Gordon goes went over to his house. So one day I turn night I turn on the TV like you get there he is running around on them. It was amazing Neal was up there too he was up their attitude."

" Here's a pain I did Al Newhart and you -- newspapers. And there's -- involves putting the flag but it was my office mate we had this thing secretary. And he was in this office and and I was next to him in and we both came out there. It is pretty much the same guy that you as -- By the -- change going to the -- didn't change anybody. Going to them and made everybody more reveal more like they were. In my take anyway anything I say not just my opinion way is like. I know this it's more like this is -- seems to me so. Dealers who was acquired it's very friendly but never came in to just chat was all business. Would come go to meetings and leave the meeting comes to his office to be reading it textbook or something like that. We have to go somewhere else for gold train you put it down and go do that he didn't say much notice you didn't say much now. Didn't say much there whenever he did say anything. Of people listen up because usually was pretty well thought -- that same guy there that was then. So by the way when did this painting called him up and talk with him about it he said it was scary moment. What was there about. It will couldn't hit that flagship in the ground like in training. What do you think was different he said it will up there where there's never been wind and rain. Those particles in the dirt there all angular. They're like co borrowers -- they're not rounded like rock or sand. It's on -- I just didn't like that. It would go win in up there it like that didn't go. They want more worried about -- would like it imagined it. It when -- let go of it would fall into the dirt people all over the world which the American -- involved here. What did you do he said tipped it back and tell the center of gravity. The Flagstaff that curtain rod that there holds out the flag and the flag work over the whole. And then put wander around nude if I ever get it balanced and get away from it. That it would without any wind or anything but stable. So we say that's what we did we got away from -- we never got close to it again. It probably -- offer one they launched it probably did but didn't make any difference but that's that's an engineer solution to a problem. This is a pain in your mind either way it's the same one that we saw a minute ago -- that's -- but it appears. I left the space program. In 81 hours training for as the shuttle commander and begin to say to myself you know. Art has -- property. In pain in his hobbies on experiences I had on the move. And I said there's a lot of young men and women here that could fly the space shuttle was good design -- better. But there's nobody's been to them and it has. Obvious its partner's interest in doing. Maybe. If I can learn to paint well enough that I can leaves a legacy that would exist here if I didn't do it. So I left the program I loved the astronaut. I would never lead when this came. And it's -- that I had a role to fail it was unique and I can make -- contribution I can do something that with my dream and song that nobody else could it. So just actually I didn't think think of it. Our planet so that's why Atlanta and so I've been doing that for 27 years now which is longer than it was Apollo astronaut. This is a pain I recently did advise the reason I did it. We've all seen that that's the most famous. Image from Apollo. Is we don't have a good. -- in your picture of -- I mean -- that is up and this is a -- active in the steel making that very picture. And so I -- little model astronauts like they were one that was taken. I saw the reflection in the -- there's buzz right there in -- And that's how he held the camera in training so I knew we did it that way there's there's chatter -- the lunar module back there. And he's got all hopeful sign because we back up and look at buzz he's kind of in the -- look in this way that's me over there and I use it. Reflection to get. New -- picture correctly. So there is something. That didn't exist and I've done a lot of that because I know lots of stories from our mission. -- the night -- from other nations. And I said you know I can definitely stories I can also be lost forever if I didn't do so that's the reason I'm now on artists I like it. Every day's fun fun I like my job just as much as I like being an astronaut. Which it seems strange people could -- thing it being an artist and an astronaut almost the opposite in the polls ruling. Difficult professions. But they're both her report OK we'll Apollo eleven gets back to earth they come -- fascinates we say we're ready to go. World when you -- your race you don't know where you don't wish -- were going back to sea of tranquility. And trying to learn to go there for seven years they say we're not going there anymore. You guys are going to the ocean storms. And we're gonna you're gonna go where -- surveyor spacecraft like this and -- 33 months earlier. And you're gonna cut off that TV camera there holding and to use your encompass group and some other stuff -- the minute. We spent seven years trying to just lands somewhere on there -- get home safe. And you know we know Apollo eleven landed within a couple miles were still not sure where it didn't make any difference -- tough thing to do it. But they said you're gonna land write this thing. We say well wait a minute. How we gonna do that it's what you get with mission control of Grumman and my team here came up through a number of times and other people. And you are gonna figure out how to land near that. -- We -- two months and they know we're gonna give you four months since we've already made it to the so we didn't think it would work we didn't think we can do it but our leaders. Understood. That our team was better than we knew I understand that everybody in this room is better than they think they don't care how big your ego is your better. I'm telling you. It I'm 76 now I didn't know that -- sport I know right now everyone in this room is better than anything. Every one industry and new more than make it much more. -- going to -- but anyway. So we started working and sure enough about three months we began to find a way that we thought work with a mission control that we could make a pin point landing. Most it was mission control in the radar tracking and all that let -- fly it they had to put this near there and we could land. So sure enough. We get ready to go it's November and there's our rocket standing. Seven. And a half million pounds of -- six million pounds of fuel one of the funny things was going out of the launch pad on the morning. When it was fueled up and we're ready to go before that you go out there and there's hundreds of people in every little. Access poll and nook and cranny work and work and we go out there that morning. Nobody there it's. There's that thing is it's six million pound bomb sitting there and nobody wants to just hang around if they don't have reason. So we get out there and we know what to say and we had to give him you know take our own elevator up and everything like that we go over the top up to that."

" Sort of try this swing arm right here remember walking across -- look down here. And this thing was full of liquid oxygen liquid hydrogen is sort stages. And the wind blowing by the -- it was so cold. That it froze the win there were pros that would moisture out and -- game sheets of ice on the side of that vehicle. It is I watched him the sheets would build up and they would get so heavy that it could stick on anymore. And they would fall and I would watch him and they go sit down the side of the vehicle. And just crash could hear his helmet on with my little. Air conditioning system so good here there's like a silent movie watching some of these. Icebergs that show when big pieces follow those iceberg that this was the rock and we were going to them. When I show you the launch -- you'll see a bunch of white things. Following a way that is the ice it was time zones that are on there -- we crawled in there and we've got ready to -- It wasn't so scary because we practice is so many times that's a good thing about practice you get. Used to this it was only about fifteen minutes before we win. And I began to say you know were really going to them. -- that are spacecraft is working right we had rain but we didn't think it would bother -- at all. And so the president was there so we thought they're gonna send us off to them and today. And sure enough we looked at each other and and we put out our hands like that you know and looked at each and we didn't say anything. An astronaut thinks -- thing this and risky times. They don't say gee I hope I don't lose my life your party trying believe that you won't you you'll be able to. To do the right thing usually it's -- thought like. I hope. I can remember all the things that I'm supposed to do in case something goes wrong what procedures I've learned I hope that I can do. So I feel I know that's what was going through my mind and -- today in and what I've heard from other pastor you want to do the job -- business and you want to do it like you've been trained. So that things on your mind you've seen that white stuff coming off there's ice right there following all this thing so much games sinners. Anyhow it shakes -- rattles and rolls the thought that ran through my mind about. Two seconds before lift at all because engine start up at seven seconds which is -- strong enough to withstand this kind of aberration. I've never been in any thing evaporated like that vehicle look at -- seems faintly. But in real life issues. Shaking all over the place if you put a new car on top where the command module is. It would shake the doors it would shake the -- lose it would shake out the windows. It is really something like I ever ever. What it did to me was I'm thinking of one of the engineers knew this and about the time he said. One lift off I'm supposed to be thinking about throwing the switch and I think it is is that you get ready come apart. So I've got a little behind but I caught -- but it is harder. It was a shock to me. Offered no here's what what the earth looks like beautiful beautiful place. I'll talk more about that later there's there's North America right there there's Baja California. Here's where I live in Houston here's the reason. Up here the Great Lakes. So maybe Boston. Me. Here's Florida they concede that -- because when you look through the atmosphere that's blue. It it looked makes the earth -- and so the green things near the edge of the water you can release him. The further you get away from the earth like the -- you would never -- Florida. Because it just looks like the blues the blue and green and become world -- so here's Boston right in here somewhere yes maybe. Somewhere around that car. Rocky Mountains. There. Washington away rather -- there. It looks like that believe me what it looked like I mean where is the earth was going away from us. Did look like we were leaving and I can remember thinking. I hope we can catch it because we had to go away for eight days we were gonna be back for a couple more after that. And I thought we're gonna have to go to a different place in states. Are gonna have to catch up with this -- is moving along it. 66000. Plus 2300 miles an hour. I hope to people emission control can figuring out. While. It's a funny feeling what everybody within three have you is going that way you're going this way. This is a pain -- your mind. That's the earth didn't look that bad I use -- licensed to do that. Yeah that's sort of what it looked like as we went down the land I can remember thinking. Boy I hope we get back from this because we knew where -- was now a long way. It's not like astronauts don't have fear I don't know how -- their -- out. They did we just are willing to do it because we we think it's worth it. And so it's it's the same as other professions. Where people take big risks I found -- less difficult to take. A risk my life and sometimes take financial risks that some people take fairly easily. So it just depends on your own personality when we were landing I was looking out that win over there. That would excuse me. -- went -- right there. In the papers about this win and I can remember when we pitched over and looked down there and I looked out. And all of us all all over the place. Work craters. We've got two minutes of view. I don't see -- single thing pleased the way. -- where it went way up. And I thought I can't perform really well if I'm scared it is. So I remember looking him in when I'm looking at me get my head down like that my peripheral vision wouldn't look out the window that it would just like in the simulator. So I looked AM and read the computer to -- did some other things until like kind of settled down but I didn't want missed the trip either. So -- looked out and and we were lower and I began to see. Spaces between careers maybe there was a place to. I'll have to say did chuckle every time someone comes up to me and tells me. Did you guys really go I don't think you did I think you did this. Anger -- on -- Well let that happen not a good idea yeah."

" So. I've ever argue whether it. Maybe we -- But anyway we came in Atlanta and there's a -- first. Now right here the first thing I did when."

" This pocket right here first when I became nationally become an astronaut after a year -- For being extricated they get your silver -- It has a star. And then coming back from the start like three -- like shooting star and then there's or. There's an astronaut. It simple so I wore that thing on my jacket. Lot of other places during the years from 64 and 65 years and had that again. In this pocket right here. And so the first thing I did one -- on the moon is not walked over beside the lunar module. To where I could see surveyor often that traders 656. Anyway and I took my opinion he can't throw over handedness that you can't throw under. And I took my opinion NC there's the rules are retirees. In New -- Through that as far as like good -- surveys. So when I look at the moon at night. I'm look at him. I of the equator in and I look over to the -- about thirty degrees because that's where really. Can't see this graders too small even with a telescope but I think about that little -- out there. And I think you know it's up there just as shiny as the -- accurate. Because there's no atmosphere up there to make it rush is -- shiny in his. There -- will be there for millions and millions of years -- until some terrorist it was there's someday. Could sit up and brings it back. So now. When you fly about fifteen miles you get our goal pins like that this is it I had that. And my other pocket which is right. There so when I picked up the first one I made sure I -- one. I didn't throw my goal anyway so. Anyway. Here I am running along the moon it reminded me of when when I grew up in Texas but my grandparents were from Michigan. So in the winner often for Christmas we grew up their -- holiday -- of snow suits on the clothes you wear in the winner here in the -- And that's what it felt like to me running around in my space suit on them. Just like I was a kid when I was all bundled up and collages and gloves admittance. My face was cold and in the winner up there spaceflight so I was felt good but the isolation from the moon was differ. Now this was a lot of fun. Because -- only -- one. Six of what I weighed on her way to 150 pounds in question backpack way to 15300. Or perhaps. So really the only -- fifty pounds. In the curious thing about it is. That meant my arms only weighed 16 of what -- smashed everything right once fit. So what it felt like to me that's I thought about it process them on the -- 16. And I knew could I just work and it felt like I was his strongest I've ever been in my life. I could jump up so high that lift rocks that I couldn't possibly live on -- I was like Superman four the day. Today Israel but that's the feeling out there and I think that going to the -- As tourists is going to be one of the big things in the future. People go up their minds. Resources that go up there to explore geologist who go up there to do that. Scientists are going to do it but I think there's gonna be huge demand -- cheaper way to go safer way to go. Just to go up there imagination says. Someday my great great great grand kids will -- see their grandfather say. Granddad why don't we go to Disney World. And he said is great but we went last year down to Florida and you know we don't mean that granddad. Joey down the street his parents went to the -- the Disney land up there in they had the best and they rocketed up there it. -- we're gonna big bubble. First -- guys in this room and and finally the size of the superdome and even maybe the size of the city Sunday so that you don't have to wear this bunny suit. They have. More fun and -- was like oh okay let's go. So that's not gonna be in our lifetime or her lifetime but it's going to be some day passes that. You know here we are 2008. Think how the world has changed in 2000 years 2000 years from now people will be living on the men living on Mars. Going mountaineers started -- an intelligent life all these things. That we don't get a chance but we will have started our generation started this they'll look back. Our century. I can sixteen and Nelson Neil Armstrong. Was the first guy that ever goes to another world besides earth. Now there's millions out there he was the first one. So these are the fun things that are gonna."

" Happen they'll have the Olympics up there -- first the first Olympics that -- what's that's almost 3000 years ago okay. -- Before 3000 years in the future they'll accept it. Arsenal have to have new records running isn't very fast because it's like yours so light. That you can keep -- should go so spreads are going to be that much fun to watch. But project. And hold off. Shot put desk there's no telling what they'll do that. All of those things are gonna be fine and they're gonna be beat these are great adventures for. For our descendants they're just different they're going to be fun. Here I am carrying out has some experience they would formed when your management commitment and there apparently said. Here and carry out -- finding a place for the national -- this because when I got back home. Here. Here's a picture of me. Right there can -- things. They reversed it but they say dinosaur bones. Let me ask. One young kids here you think that's a dinosaur bone you think that's it. What is it. But it's not done what you think it is. -- right now. You're right. So even the people who did this thing they don't know -- from actual. But we didn't see any of that stuff everybody want to firm signs that ancient civilizations. Pete and I talked about this we said. This is the great story let's take an arrow -- up there. And and will will throw this still ahead on our feet. And it will be showing on the TV camera shot over here you know we'll look at this the mountain over here whatever was in there we'll do like this. And we're going tonight. Look at look at -- over there and we did hear the people on earth for scientists don't look at your pain points and right interface. But we realize that we had done that and that there are some side is that don't have a good sense of humor about. Thank -- hook that would have run us out of here's the not a -- if we come back. But great idea we just let -- we do. Here we are -- where we did get over surveyor would cut off that. Cut off that -- we didn't have to cut off brought it home we come off the TV and did the other things we're supposed to. It was gonna creditors thirteen degrees slopes when -- those things put my little survey of modeling with thirteen degree slope and and that's what we're."

" This is what I can do and this is opinion including that chat list when it. So I've got out my checklist which still have and opened it to that page. And went outside. They look about the say the -- is. Six 6000 miles and -- 8000 miles in diameter. Earth is 8000 miles an hour and noon eastern -- Four times bigger and so I went out and personal I felt I -- do I remember doing that holding my hand up and there's a year. And then I pointed right that it's not stated bluntly first and then I thought I better go out this this so -- outside at night. Did the same thing with the moon but the move is in -- earth wasn't there either it was 240000. Miles there so when you look at this you. I'm not pointing at this. Hurt but I if we follow this. And went back like that point right. So if they paralyzed from that viewpoint makes it look different so these are the kind of things that come up when you're paying something other people don't -- And first thing and this checklist page so it looked just like the checklist. And that's not very hard. So then I went in and kind of made it a little hazy we've -- little bit this is where you do everything as an artist and what you do is wait a bit too much. And and you gotta go back to straighten it out. And after about three of these generations it looked pretty good. So right now looks pretty good so you can see what it is but like voters out there Welker will work. I was deployed house. So anyway that's that's where -- pain. Here we are working together had learned to work individually. To learn to work with a team the world wonder what routine mission control. Mission -- to work with the people around the US today. Is different parts -- helping hands. And let me put this up here is this prominent news story. Number one thing I learned in this we're in the simulator just like this one day. We're practicing landing on the moon. And you practiced landing then after you either aborted -- landing or whatever mission control gave you that you were. There have to reset human lunar orbit that took about fifteen minutes and days and so we've talked and so here we are in our suits practicing landings were talking. -- And standing like this stay there are pretty well you know that briefing this morning from that flight engineer. I don't know he seemed to know. You know he doesn't always -- What was talking about. But his way he thought it was just so different from months. And finally got to the point. It took forever said. Maybe he isn't good team or maybe we ought to think about. Replacing. I looked over POP. Look it -- one -- but you didn't do it looked -- new initiative. Maybe issues. Do you feel if your boss giving you one day or your wife or your husband that you know. You're not a good team. Well I feel just like that was so and so. That I remember back in just like -- could go any further this way -- Atlanta news. Good gamers -- going you know the first rule being it. For you do what is it. Well you you've got to be loyal to -- leader you've got to stay focused on the goal. -- are you remember one -- So bears did. Just. You can imagine -- when he told me that because he was the most important person. -- my wife on earth to me really you know we're going to the movie chilled me to go within you know here he tells her I'm not exactly -- So I said. Told a bunch of stuff and he said that India. Should okay what is it he said. Well 400000 people that's what's gonna take prosecuted them. 400000 Albanians could get us there and 400000. -- congrats it necessary. Action where maybe they came. To do so what. He should we need 400000. People that. Our dedicated like we are but I think differently than we do they have a different point of view and we can work together and maybe we will find a way. Should go -- a simple what's the first rule of being good good team ever he said. You've got to find -- way to admire and care about all the other team members. Opposite your crazy. You see what do you think he's actually what we're in this meeting this morning about thirty people in there. I knew about seven radio. And I did my arm that had good ideas that work wear them and then there was maybe. Fifteen have Merv thirteen of or something like that. There have been other meetings they don't say much. I don't know who they are. And -- said and there's always in every meeting there's always drew three. I don't like they bring up subjects right at the end of the meeting were -- ratings go home your ideas are completely weird. They don't agree with me probably. But anyway. If he's -- that's the problem right there. He said if you ever wanna be a leader. You have got to find a way that you admire and care about. All these people on your -- once you interact with 4000 but the ones we -- Well I didn't like only -- in another space program I'm not quit. Go somewhere where they appreciate me god to watch what another space program had -- day. So I did and it was tough couple weeks but it during the a couple of weeks I've watched. And thought about some of the other astronauts in our office that were more effective -- I don't consider myself a particularly effective astronaut that tan. In getting the ideas -- But there were some that did Jim active it's -- began to think about him and he knew everybody knows meetings. He treated the people that had the good ideas with the same respect and know little or more than the ones that had a bad idea. So he had not he had found a way naturally. To admire. All the people on the team. They were maybe -- right as the it was a lot more effective. So I began to start trying to do that. What I found out is one. Would try to do that I found out that for me. If I wanted to think negative things about a person I could think of several things but I began to say. You know I'm gonna try to find three positive things about everybody on my team. I'm not gonna think the negative ones because all of us have pluses and minuses. Depends on me which ones I decided to pay attention to. So I began to do that I found out there were still several people I just. Couldn't find anything I've heard about. And I took on the lunch. And when I would take the lunch and get to know them a little better. Then I can find three things are more than about -- it was always fall was always me. Wasn't there. Okay. That is what I plan -- It changed my life. Started being a lot more effective astronaut and I began to realize that this needed to be. Put in other areas of my life particularly my wife and children."

" The minute I'm at home now if I'm brushing -- can say. Leslie -- didn't take that package to the to the post office yesterday that I answered here. I'm short of time she's got to get the minute that goes through my mind I say. I'm thinking in having negative thought about -- not an admiring thought about her I'm not gonna do that because she's my number one Keenan Burton now. So the reason I'm telling that the view those of you on teams think about those of you that are not classmates these young girls need to get out there. Class picture. And come up with three reasons they admire each one of their classmates. I don't care if they dislike him or not don't forget all. So anyway with -- all of life. Changed my life."

" He's my life lesson number one thing I'm gonna I'm gonna move off and on that we see Al Shepard on Apollo fourteen that this golf ball. And it's great you know I think wow. Why did we think of that and I don't. I go to opinion as to what we think it's not like that he said well we don't play golf I think we're."

" So. I thought what could we have done it pitched that well we like football we could have taken a football. And we kind of put the TV on us and we could have thrown a pass and then you could kick it back if we'd done this. They would show that happened on this global effort on November. But we never did it but as an artist. There's a pain. It's me. Being an artist is the completely."

" Anyway. That. Airspace museum you know we won -- raced to the -- we were working hard glad. Remember we were real happy about that here's a -- I did. Dick Gordon was going to be the commander OKK. Twenty. So we thought it well he would be walking. But he didn't want. That paint this picture of today we're looking at the camera. People in mission controllers saying in this thing -- fantasy. That he get down there. Is that under the command module is so I've got these little things up -- it is yours Pepsi. Center. -- Why not mission control this is just offense not really -- room. Talk a little bit for Oregon art. One heart to be different. It was the first art ever done and all these centuries. Of a place other than a year someone that shall. It needs to be different. So I started off and just like that subject but like other artists and in hybrid satellite pictures are put in texture like other artists. And in one said to myself you know I've gotten. I've got a camera that took -- I've got some other things. I certainly the texture with the tools I had. On them. So ideas. Normally I do that before the page -- industry. So you'll see -- few minute. There's a camera and then we spoke to leave it there and brought it back. And I -- into the air and space museum in Washington and they -- a lot of years doing the tipster with nod jewels. I wrote -- instance and and that really goes back to -- right now I use it to put capturing these different meanings. Okay after I did that -- like those moon -- walking across the pain and things like that. I've we -- and some. Related it was a Little Rock Wii owners thought they give us rock. Something. But that didn't. And just what enough rock to go around on the people really -- as we got to go what we want the most deserving people than managers and other people that dream this up and made it happen really deserve rock on more than we did. We got at the visible part but we knew we were the biggest contributors. So I'm -- my Studio One day. And I'm looking up at the wall at that."

" Things that. Which from my suit there's. Children and asked that. -- Receiver played there was on them so I said wait a minute they're dirty with America. I'd do. If I were to. Cut these up like god -- there. I could put those in paintings and I really it would moon dust storms and there so that's what I do. -- put that in. So here's a -- And that's what it looks like underneath the partners -- here from Roman rulers like rate. Oil from the command module that was sent me from museum this -- charred bits from heat shield. That was charged off when we came in the pride and agree. So they -- and put -- One thing I love about being an artist. If you don't have to have a reason to do. You just do what life. And so I thought -- lot -- these in there with me in the -- if you want to do that you have to have a meeting that. Thank you would put it there you could prove that the thing you know but as an artist -- like you don't like it tough. You because yours without optima was the it's a book about it is that one of my favorite kinds of G concern and yet. There's June from policy at me and -- that in Houston he's been. He comes over one -- say it again look at that's the place where you scoops of dust off that boulder. And brought back to -- He's you know I wish I'd written dollars and -- didn't -- the progressive writer name on this piece of paper just like you were. Her -- restrictions and so when he lipped -- my brush and -- In recent years traces boulder. And I like that a lot because of that story genes are like yeah. And we as taxpayers. To spend millions of dollars. Going back up there it."

" That's a -- a vehicle that's not fail to walk."

" And the I did it all go to begin with it didn't feel right. And when I did even more rainbow colors I thought maybe that is on fail I don't know for sure but that's pure."

" I'm asking a lot of time about religion but people. Thought when they went to the -- there's always been thought. That inflation -- you couldn't go there were superior beings like used to be on top of Mount Olympus. And when people went on top of Mount Olympus are warning you guys up there. So then they moved from somewhere else and finally moved I don't know where there is written so I'm not making -- But maybe -- in heaven or maybe about the clouds with a huge thing for airplanes in airplanes came along. Well heaven wasn't. Maybe it's further out so people are always asking me I've been curious about it they don't know the answer. And so when I was on the moon I did this. I've set time aside to see if any kind of information. Additional information that I didn't get on earth came to me. And show the title of this page is anybody out there. And that's kinda hard disk and then we're doing and I can remember several times in flight data had written in my flight plan. That to be quiet and think about it. And for me. I didn't. -- anything more than I do right now. Other astronauts. Did it. Several felt the presence of god on the -- What it seems to me as a result of that is the ones that were religious. Went to the moon and -- that some of these feelings did but they came back from the -- a little more religious. And those that were religious came back a little more not religious so it didn't really change anybody nobody changed going to the moon. And I don't think maybe that the answer for religion is out there or anywhere else is here. So if you have these feelings in your heart one way and that's -- this for years. And the person next to you that you could be married to your brother sister. Mother father they have different feelings in here it's different. One of my good friends. Was. -- where and he was one that felt the presence of god and god help him on them and several other things and so I did this painting of him. And its call we came in peace for all and and we really did one of the things that's wonderful about Apollo if we. It was a great challenge and their candidate for all the right reasons we did a good thing for humankind for civilization. Things like that. So I did this for Jim -- I think about it."

" But he's dead now -- of -- heart attack he was one on Apollo fifteen which was the first mission to go for three days. And we didn't know what they're potassium. Would. Leach out of their body in Europe and other ways and it caused heart arrhythmia. And I think that. His heart was damaged there -- later on he had -- over it can happen Colorado Springs. So we don't know. But that's the risk you take you agree astronaut. And I like this painting I think about it a lot wonder how he's doing. Anyway. Off we go just like earth except it was a quiet because without in fact you went nowhere you don't hear anything. So -- like riding a very fast outside elevators if you've ever done and or to tail off -- There's an earth from the I look back at the year and I thought wow that is beautiful. And looked all around the moon it was great rock. Grade -- blacked out. I knew what Mars looked like it was -- dirt Redgrave -- grace. News that. Mercury would just like the moon nothing ever happened there was 400 degrees or something like that. Venus the next one out towards the earth is cloud -- radar notion look just like in the nothing's ever been there probably. Nothing's ever been in our solar system appears at the moment. That is anything like that I've come to the conclusion may be just an opinion. That when the Bible was written years and years ago they only knew the area the people that read reading it and repeating the stories and then. Written down. Only news. The area around the tigris Euphrates River -- that golden crescent has called it. And so I think this story at the garden of Eden evolved. That way -- some spot over there in Iraq modern day Iran Iraq. I don't think. I think the garden if there is such things forward. -- that place that we get to live our whole life. Is the most beautiful place in the universe. If any of us have ever seen with telescopes. -- probes that go out. -- There's nothing new -- there's nothing within. 45 light years this more beautiful than what we see when we walk down one of the borrowers this auditorium tonight think about that. People are complaining about. Yours sometimes. I'm never complained about -- I'm so glad we get to live there we've got. Bushes trees. We've got a little animals -- got people. We got a lot of things that no one else maybe there's somebody who's -- not around other stars I don't know. I'm not sure we'll ever know. There's that huge distances and -- someone told me once that. Did density of stars in the universe got some astronomers here -- like two chip monks in all of North America. Just think if you're chipmunk in Florida and you wanna meet someone to fall in love with and they happen to be -- Alaska. -- those statistics okay we'd we'd like to meet some some aliens from somewhere. I don't think -- I wish we would wish they'd come tomorrow because they came here -- be a lot smarter than we are we can't go there yet. By the time we go there we don't know so much more than now they could come by here and make -- teachers how to cure cancer. They can give us a little box to put on a woman's chest and say there's a check for birth defects in babies. If you get one that's either cleft -- turn the knob here -- that button. It teaches how to do all those things and done. I don't believe anyone show. But someday when we show up. Which we will from day troops or else. We know things I think we're trying to help these people. So anyway that's only Montel I don't know I don't know. I left this one this is an eclipse that we saw. Of that sun. The earth where the only three people it's ought ever -- we went man. That's who you are fair that little bit of thing is our atmosphere. And as we put this on this was about two hours before landing in the Pacific Ocean. Then all over when it completely. Eclipsed us on. Then there was just this little ring all the way around it you can sort of see down here there's a spectrum. Well in real life that you could see it you know rewards you beer all the way around I don't know why broke up that way. But that's where it was a little bands and little -- Order and then when he did I looked and here. And here was just like -- at this school. Right over here which all of Africa. There was in you right there Saudi Arabia. And I was looking down there think well half life there were some bright light right here which was the right. Well. This. And all through here there was like flash. And I thought what is that an -- he did what is that. And pictures you know that looks like thunderstorms when we flyable over anarchy thirty days maybe 50000 meters 40000 feet. And we look real closely. And those were thunderstorms. In the right along the equator. It was the quarter and what was happening is that thunderstorms that built up during the day. Were were dissipating. And flashing in and -- who knows what -- there all along that. That he court about that time we've assigned him -- the other side. And we've got Reagan made sure it was incredible site. There was just one incredible sight that this lunar mission. And the most amazing part was the sites as opposed to the field running around. Just what you saw it being so amazing. Nice to see those come out. I can remember looking out the window this is -- story. This page Wendell minds over there this was -- I remember looking out the window and seeing this water and saying. It's so beautiful waters -- she is gorgeous. And I looked up and I can see some white fluffy clouds going across and here was the aircraft carrier quality coming this way. Obviously this is so beautiful. Thought. What's the big deal were in the middle of the Pacific Ocean and I'm thinking this is really beautiful. And I got to think -- you know we've only been on ten days but in those ten days we've never seen anything -- But three of us there Tuesday issue. That's the way it is no one's ever seen anything change them every since Galileo stores stadiums sixteen owner. No craters -- overshadowed nothing's overture saying with Marshall -- all these places that ship here. That this place. I've not complained about the weather conditions obviously. I'm glad we've got -- Not complained about the crowds. I remember when I can -- style winter's shopping center several days and -- guy screamed don't just looked at the people. I'm glad I'm here. On some little place we just report people like that threw for people. It's not like being in this room. We don't we're -- and related in the garden beaten and generally live and or did you just might be a good time to answer a few questions. One thing."

" So. -- cancer few questions. And let's see we'll take as many as we can't we're not gonna take questions too long because he needs it take off so. Right over here. Yes. To listening to that."

" What was your favorite part of going on the spaceship."

" What was my favorite part of going on spaceship. -- that question. Okay. I don't know I just think. It was where we went we went through and in -- an incredible place. That you can go accepted fascia. If you look at the spaceship down here in. The lower level. It seems small he didn't sings well there's nothing -- that if we got in there and spent ten days he would -- real small. Because with one gravity. You know you'd -- on this side appreciated it -- you turn over and if hip personal like that when your zero gravity you're floating around here closure don't even touch it. And so your your just real relaxed and sold -- well I'd never heard and astronauts say boy this is a little spaceship. 'cause it seemed okay her a lot of himself or wish fruit are better off. Our I wish I wish we had some -- TV you're so so video or something to look at. While we're waiting. To get to the moon or something but. Is the inflation as you go oysters much like your car. Your car is just a tool to get you an interest in places school vacation. --"

" It's."

" But here you can't stop it little little."

" When you're out yeah I think got. -- gone gone as well thank you want it going next heat in the game."

" When I -- you alone did -- ever think we're -- matters right. No that's a good question. When I was your age are up in junior high and high school I just wanted to be upon. And I wasn't the best student in the class I've never been the best student in the class -- always worked hard. But never made you may be in my high school I wasn't even -- Twenty you know I don't remember but. I never was the best but I was always someone. That knew what he -- he wanted to be -- And so then I was willing -- to take courses you know chemistry and I didn't care about you -- but I thought it may be better. When I went off to the university pictures -- aeronautical engineering. Because I thought it make you better pilots among my friend said well engineers too hard I think I'll take some males and they did that. But. I think you could see. No war to give you when I was selected as an astronaut got a letter from one of my teachers. And you think she would say something wonderful but she wanted to be honest. In the best."

" The best she could come up where although I admired -- was. -- remember you favorably."

" That's hard to it yet. It's hard to do a good job -- all the vendors remember you favorably. But she didn't know me at the age I was. When they started selecting astronauts what's the same person like I said earlier. -- wasn't the same person and I was one receiver lives. Changed I've learned a lot done. You can do that one of them one of the best reasons that I'm always trying to be the best I can be -- not. -- and the reason is because people that tried the best they can be recommended. Then after about two years your different person that you would be if you didn't try to be the best you can be. Many people think they're gonna be saying is that you know that's not true. If you try to be the best you can be every day. Two or three years from now. Let's say sister who doesn't. We don't know a lot or machines you're going to be more capable person person she does -- that you altered so I'm always recommended and your kids. Do the very best you can do every single day everything you do particularly. The things you don't like it feel like to mow the lawn -- didn't. My mother and I -- store I didn't like work in there and I didn't have this attitude -- the minimum slip by. Always regretted that now. I'd love to be at my attitude now. Go back and help her have a great -- cream store she and I would make the greatest ice cream stored Fort Worth I didn't think that way. It's too bad she didn't know about that. So we. I -- that it."

" Everyone try to do is hard to do. Not fall short every single day but I'm always struggling to do it. Yes excuse me Robert."

" And I think I have my."

" Is -- speech on yet. You. It is throws the two's meaning his equipment in north division and a -- them. Four and but this means you. You support can vote him. Teamwork Hairston and it is very important mission because Russians. You know all of his people. So long do you want to was secret have you on now because they never let us have never wanted them to the wrong. One this. This team. And 6264. I participated. In obtaining these few postal station in to. But it never happened quote that we will update -- some papers value. But. To read but what they want it to those into production but the question use that time you -- them younger than myself. Noses what did you think it -- so if you look pro. That. For a meat is an important."

" Well that's a good question we knew we were in competition with the Russians we wish them the best we -- ourselves. We were in -- competition. We wouldn't we didn't know much about. Much about you what you were doing. But we would -- cosmonauts it appears leadership. Elections ago as. -- some of these other guys we admired and we've talked with. And when we could talk with them which was always because it was a lot more control and it is now. And what reasons did it would tell -- as much as they could without betraying the nation. And we were. Converse with them we always thought of them as Brothers and is a professional Brothers you know but in different countries we like to football players from different from the giants and patriots. Each -- Good example. I think it's a perfect example. They didn't wanna -- wanna play and play hard they wanted to win I'm sure when the gamers or they were hurt I was I was a patriot. But at the same time that's the way we thought. Now and under torture and today we just didn't know we do not poaching war. There after I finish that I was about -- commander for the joint Russian American. Learn to speak Russian. -- one order Russia worked with a cosmonauts. Spent a lot of stars I don't know we better not. But. A lot to those guys and so did everybody else we'd like that -- highlight the Russians I'm so glad that we're kind of friendly we have a lot more in common and Russians and we do with some other cultures Russians are good neighbors. Russians if you can work wear them. And be on the same side there -- the best team players. They are big Russian. Don't -- way. Okay pictures."

" It won't yet it's something you. But. Yet. To what -- But the person. But."

" You made it. -- That's -- the all public stuff other KGB control I know where law and it is the very best that it is and here I am striving. -- overcome this that is no please no orders it's not. Easy way to."

" Somehow -- extremely generally -- couldn't. I've enjoyed it cosmonaut election and -- a great artist I've been to a studio in Moscow I got a nifty rush from the guy. I don't know the -- right. Yeah election particularly as one. Now I wanna save it. When they would visit us and say one other thing about this even at that time. When that would visit us. We would go to tune to people around used and it did it. You know more assets that we needed and we say can we put on a party for the Russians can we do this can -- Taken to the ball game can week. Well. That's always had to sit and people just jumped up and down. No expense spared to try to improve friendly relations with the Russians and when we went over there they did the same thing does. So -- the human level. Russians and Americans want to be friends they want their natural Floridians. They're really do I hope I'm hoping for the future."

" That -- well. -- maybe one more house that --"

" Well let's hear what your favorite moments on the moon actually walking on them."

" Well that's good question favorite moments now. The way I tended to think about it. Why is. We've got more jobs has signed on our cuff checklist I showed it to one's slide one picture then we've got time. So what I better do is do what that is there is much is like and in the two times on out and get that done and that I can think about the fun stuff when I get back home. That was my general basic. Idea. I felt like for a metaphor football metaphor some guy waits his whole life to get in the Super Bowl. And he's a defensive back and gets in the Super Bowl and he's standing there saying. -- I've made it look at the sciences has -- volleys doing that some wide receiver runs buying and catches a touchdown. Okay I didn't want that to happen to me. But at this and several times up there when I was running along. Not between stations were we had to do work running the next station I would say well the system. Up there there's fear. We finally got here you know it's hard to believe we were up there we. It's hard to believe we were doing this but we were there doing it a couple of times I threw things I -- I haven't got here. That one day when did last second and went out to. -- pick up an experiment bring it back in aggregate radiate back and I came across -- big sheet of foil that'd been surrounding area and deplored. Saud nice -- I'm gonna throw this fourth. And it's fun to throw things like up here because if we tried to throw oil on earth with its atmosphere if I went like this they would. It would wiggle wiggle wiggle and I don't like the person it would go anywhere fall right there. Because it's got not much math and a lot of dry. But up there it throws as good as a rock so I. I took that peace upon Pete Fisher repeat was stored up should wait a minute now wanna watch so we turned around I did this. In an apparent -- wherever you find it and so I took this thing and I went back through it. And I watched him go up in -- was turning like this slowly. And it just went it's. It was higher than any partner can kick no doubt about it. Because of the 16. Mac and I watched as it turned over and to -- and I thought this isn't funded news. I threw a couple rocks out there when I had a moment. And through -- and I -- us. Just they just were small and you know just -- go far enough for the ago -- watched that people are gonna wanna do this is on there. Some day when the NFL players on the -- To change change the rules. Because they're not going to be able to run as fast as going to be slower than the slow motion that you. Show now you know the replay is slow it's gonna be slower than that but the parts in that. Passes. No telling what they considered. So I these are just fun things but that's enough questions let me got to -- slide -- tried it."

" All right here we are we're on the way home."

" Pete and Dick and I are looking out the -- we're about halfway home 125000. Miles -- he's saying you know. We're invisible to the universe from here even the best telescope -- can hear them and and it there were telescopes on Mars or somewhere else which we don't think there is. They couldn't seriously. So we eat are so small humans are so small. We're smaller relative to the -- universe in grains of sand are relative to earth. We're just. Inconsequential. So I went to bed that I thought that's -- that's right you know floating under the couch and in my little bags sleeping. And forward to that I thought you know there's something wrong with thinking that way. So I've got up the next morning so let's look out the window again. Then -- you know. We just let the -- let's run over there. If we had the right computer program in our computer we know what that means going to be hundred years exactly. Gravity and velocity -- know exactly words but it's limited to be right over there. In the -- we're headed that way we'll be there tomorrow. We know where it's gonna be a thousand years from -- the fun we know where it's gonna beat him out if fact if we had the right computer program. And stronger here do know we're gonna an hour that's stars going to be 100000 years and and that one and one in -- we may be small. As far as we know we little humans. Aren't the only things in the universe where we don't know where we're going to be -- years. We may be small but we've been given this great idea all these other things in the universe that we know off. Are limited -- gravity velocity. The only limits that any of us. Are the ones that we place on ourselves. We've been given great gift and users. Were small. We're playing we need to work together to accomplish big things we can do. Nothing we've ever seen and your sugar machine. -- do we can we were little little. -- like to think about Apollo participating target for the astronaut all the things down to cape. To talk and in present you know what we're doing and this was not just for astronauts. But for every one that came to the museum and everybody here. We can all reach for stars were not -- I don't know -- night our hands a little bit I don't know. All these things we can do we've been given this gift. One of the reasons I like to think about Apollo is because we did something wonderful ordinary people. Believe that we can do these things that are possible and went out and tried and failed and tried and failed and tried and failed and finally made it happen. It reminds me of what is good and all of us as humans. Apollo it was a wonderful program it was we did America did this for the right thing. We -- and -- we try to advance civilization. We didn't to grab anybody's. -- or anything like that. We try to do the best job -- I think that's something that we can think about it we need justice try to do it every day. Sometimes I don't do do it sometimes. It. I like to leave you then with three thoughts are glad to be here. Glad to be with you nice audience felt like Boston anyway. I was -- patriots fan and I was hurt when they lost. Had a tough time getting over for about a week and sure it was a month review. I wanted him to have that perfect season but it wasn't to be. The giants Herndon and to win you know they wouldn't -- it was like it was a fluke. Bill. Glad to be happier. -- like to leave -- with three thoughts. Windows -- cereals. Like that. And dreams to your heart thank you very much for night."